The Kitsune vs The Waitress
by Misao's angel
Summary: When Sanosuke and Tae start giving each other googly eyes, its up to a jealous Megumi to split the new couple apart, and battle for Sanosuke's affections! Who will win, The Kitsune- who had never lost a man (Kenshin doesn't count for this) before, or the
1. Sano's a player!

The Kitsune vs. the Waitress  
  
Chapter 1: Sano's a Player??  
  
By Misao's Angel  
  
"Oi! Jou-chan!" Hollered a slightly drunk Sanosuke on a warm summer morning, but rather than enjoying the sunshine, they were spending their day in the highly (Or rather formally highly) prospering restaurant called the Akabeko. "I didn't expect to see you here!"  
  
"Oh no your not getting any money from me today Sagara Sanosuke! I need it to cook an extra special dinner for a certain HOT rurouni!!!! *Sigh* *Sigh* (She went on like that for the next ten minutes while remembering when Kenshin returned from the fight with Shishio, 'when he was knocked out AND shirtless I could look at him all I wanted and nobody knew')  
  
"Um that's nice..., but If you lend me 2 yen...(sparkle of evil glimmering in his eye) I promise I wont tell "That certain HOT rurouni" you said that." Said the broke and desperate master blackmailer, Sagara Sanosuke.  
  
"You drive a hard bargain Sanosuke, for one who owes me and Tae-san at least 50 yen each."  
  
"So you don't care if I tell Kenshin?"  
  
"Not at all."  
  
"Tell Sessha what de gozaru ka?" said the "HOT rurouni" as he entered the Akabeko hoping for something to fill his aching stomach (After all, he had just projectile vomited a tanuki's horrible breakfast).  
  
"Oh just that Jyo-chan just called you a-Mm-mph!" Kaoru cupped both of her over Sano's mouth. Sano was trying to recover his breath while the rurouni grew slightly suspicious.  
  
"She called me what?" Kenshin said hoping that it wasn't another "Girly Shrimp", "Prettier than most girls", "He's lucky the Hiten Mitsurugi-ryu taught him to jump high, or he would never reach the cookie jar", or "I can't tell if he is a little girl or a old man" like he used to get from his Shishou. Enough with the make-fun-of-the-pushover. The short girly- looking pushover. Even Pushovers get sick of it once in a while. 'Heck! If Sessha looks so girly, why does he have women flocking over him at every second and a wife? Beat that Sanosuke.' (Kenshin's mind is a very scary place. Notice the lack of "De gozarus when no one is listening)  
  
Kaoru laughed a cheesy laugh, and flashed Kenshin a nervous smile. Then she turned to the famous Zanza and whispered,  
  
"Okay fine. But this will never happen again. Got it?"  
  
"Okay!" said an astounded but happy x-street-fighter.  
  
Tae-san, who just happened to be walking by at that moment said, "Oh, Sanosuke-san you don't have to do that! I'll let you off just this once... So, don't worry about it, 'kay?"  
  
"B-But I Wouldn't want to be more trouble..." said the blushing Sanosuke  
  
"Oh so worried about Tae-san are we Sanosuke?" Questioned a smirking Tanuki.  
  
"Of c-course not." Replied the now crimson former-Zanza.  
  
"And why not? She must be worried about you! I'll have you know that one man who paid for every other meal he ever had at the Akabeko tried to free- load just once, Tae-san wouldn't let him for anything, but she seems to have no problem letting you." Continued Kaoru with a maliciously evil grin plastered on her face. 'I smell blackmail!'  
  
Little did Kaoru know that a hurt kitsune-onna had heard that part of the conversation. 'Why that bastard. Making it look like he cares for me, then flirting with Tae-san? And Tae-san, acting all sweet and innocent while she's stealing my boyfriend! I WONT HAVE IT!!!'  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
End of Chapter 1! Sorry, it's my first attempt at Sano/Megumi relationships. Sorry if it sucks. If you are still interested, chapter 2 starts the violent catfights. No one steals a kitsune's man! Please Review!!! I don't care if you criticize! Project your feelings! 


	2. The fox or the cat fight?

The Kitsune or the Waitress  
  
Chapter 2- A Fox or a cat fight?  
  
By Misao's Angel  
  
"I'll Just have to use my wit to get him back... foxes are known to be sly, ya know..." thought the scheming Megumi.  
  
"And of course, my feminine charms that have previously turned every man into putty, and which Tae obviously lacks. Or I could use my love potion... No that would be cheating! I must win him back with my heart. That sounds really corny. Or I could fight fire with fire... Get him jealous with a boyfriend of my own... like Ken-san!! Ooh The fun of it all! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOH" laughed Megumi, with her trade-mark fox ears popping out of her scull.  
  
Too bad she realize she was in the Kamiya dojo when she said that. In Kenshin's room, while she was supposed to be examining him. While he was in there too, staring at her with large round eyes and mumbling, "Oroo oroo oroo..." over and over again.  
  
"Sorry Ken-san... (Then the sly kitsune came up with the perfect idea) But you know, your absolutely wonderful features just spilled all my thoughts out of my mouth in absentmindedness... Sorry, my little Ken-san..." She said while oh-so-seductively stroking his cheek.  
  
"Kenshin just might have been seduced by this if it wasn't for the fact that... she called him "little" 'Douitsumo koitsumo,...' Too bad for Megumi that this rurouni had had enough for the day. And when the rurouni couldn't take things anymore, an entirely different part of Kenshin does. The Battousai. Kenshin started shaking violently, and his eyes rolled into the back of his head while he was screaming in excruciating pain. He flopped onto the floor, landing on his twitching back. He reached for his throat as if he were trying to free him self free from an invisible noose, then he shot up from the ground and uttered with whatever breath he still had, "T- Tomoe..." and fell over dead.  
  
The End.  
  
Just kidding! Really his eyes just turned a gold shade and shrank to about 1/3 (No junjou na Kanjou!) of their normal size. He glared at the woman who had her hand placed foolishly upon his cheek, and he reached out to strike her when... He looked at her eyes. 'She looks... so much like Tomoe...' he thought. And so, as expected, the little player instantly fell in love. I would usually say that he has no chance, by he is quite popular with the girls for such a girly lookin' shrimp. *POW!!!!* "What was dat for?" I said while holding my injured head. The heaving Battousai held the sakabatou so tightly that his knuckles were turning white.  
  
"Just write the damn story and leave me the hell alone!!!"  
  
"Awrite, Awrite"  
  
So, continuing with the story, Kenshin or should I say "Battousai", found out that he was utterly obsessed with Megumi, who was kind of freaked out but glad that her plan would work now. So, she dragged the love-struck manslayer over to the Akabeko, and began her mischievous work. To her horror, Sanosuke was staring at Tae, and she was returning the look! This was going too far for Megumi to sit quietly any longer. First, she walked by their table like a panther, swinging her hips around in an o-so "sexy" way. But, to her dismay, Sanosuke didn't even notice her. He was STILL staring at Tae. But, she did get Kenshin to drool in satisfaction. 'Great. Just what I wanted.' She thought sarcastically. But then, she remembered the reason she brought Kenshin in the first place.  
  
"Ken-san, your hair looks sooooo nice today. So silky smooth..." She looked over at Sano from the corner of her eye. Still starring at Tae. So she turned back to Kenshin, and continued. "And your eyes are such a beautiful shade of Gold." Sano didn't even seem to acknowledge her existence. "And your lips... so nice and soft... I could kiss them." Snuck a peek at Sano. No difference. Megumi was starting to lose her temper. "I COULD KISS THEM!!!!!" She hollered at the top of her lungs. And Sano was just staring at Tae, no recognition that Megumi was even there. She turned back to Kenshin, whose eyes were watering in supreme ecstasy. "Y-You Mean it?" The blushing hitokiri stuttered. Megumi was utterly frightened now. "I am going to beat that bastard to a pulp!!!!" Megumi growled. "Just after I take a leak." When the Kitsune stormed off into the Akabeko restrooms, Sano finally shut his eyes.  
  
"Wooa! You're a hard one to beat Tae-san! I am never doing a staring contest against you again!"  
  
"Hee Hee Sanosuke san! Now you owe me 2 more yen."  
  
"Just great." Said the sarcastic x-street fighter. (Not the video Game)  
  
When Megumi returned, she strode over casually over to the two, just in time to hear,  
  
"Or maybe you can just repay me with a kiss..." giggled Tae in a playfull tone.  
  
Megumi was completely outraged. So much blood was rushing to her head that she didn't even hear Sanosuke say, "Aw come on, ya know that's reserved for the kitsune" at all. With her fists tightly clenched, she belted,  
  
"Well, you disgusting boyfriend stealing slut, I don't see why you should taint public ears here and now, when you could probably do a lot worse at whatever brothel you work for at night. Actually, I think I do see why. You probably have to submit to acting horny as a low-wage waiter in some crappy restaurant 'cuz you can even get into a brothel with your looks. Unless, of course, they think you're a man! That's perfectly understandable as well."  
  
Tae, was at first dumbstruck. But after that last comment, words just started flowing out of her mouth like blood of a freshly cut wound. So, she said  
  
"Why? You say I look like a guy 'cuz you don't want to believe you're a lesbian and you have a crush on me? Well, using seeing how overly obsessed you must be with me since you were spying on me the entire day, I wouldn't be surprised at all. I really wonder who you really don't want to lose in Sano and my relationship. 'Cause I don't think Sano likes you, and I don't like you, so you have no reason to be here. Get out of my restaurant.  
  
Megumi obediently left, but only so she could plan out her next attack. 'This is going WAY too far!' she thought in angst.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Zat was chapter 2 folks! Please review! Oh yes, and next chapter, the Girls leave it up to Sano to choose who he wants. Who will it be? The Kitsune or the waitress?  
  
Oh yes, and as for Japanese terms in this chapter- Kitsune- Fox Doitsumo Koitsumo- everybody and anybody Rurouni- Wanderer 1/3 No junjou na Kanjou- it's the name of one of the Rurouni Kenshin theme songs Hitokiri- manslayer Yen- Japanese form of money Sakabatou- reverse-edged sword 


	3. The final Battle

The Kitsune vs the Waitress  
  
Chapter 3: The final battle.  
  
By Misao's Angel  
  
For the past two weeks, Tae had been giving Sano the look. And not just any look, but THE look. Megumi was horrified. Sano had been going to the Akabeko even MORE often now that he could get free food. (Not that he ever didn't but at least this time Tae wouldn't nag him) It was really pissing Megumi off. And not just Megumi, believe it or not, but all the other residents in the Kamiya Dojo as well. Well, that is, all except for the Battousai who absolutely loved it. He would nag Megumi everyday now that she had no excuse to stop him. And Sanosuke, well, he couldn't believe that he had two girls fighting over HIM at every minute. Sure, he's had suitors before, but they always seemed like the desperate type. But now that he could get the infamous Megumi to like him, he was happy. He never felt that wanted before. Not even by Sagara-taichou in the Sekihoutai. And he was about to take advantage of it.  
  
But for Megumi, her plan was finally ready to go. All she needed was a gatling gun... (Just kidding Aoshi, really!!!) Okay then, just a noose, or some secret weapon at least, and she was ready. And all she had to do to get that was ask Battousai. He was sure to have at least some in stock, former assassin and all that. So now, she was ready. It'd all start tomorrow.  
  
The next morning at 6:00, Tae set out to the Akabeko, as usual, and got ready for the long day ahead. Little did she know just how long that day was going to be. She did the usual, and spread all of the ingredients needed to make her famous hot-pots out on the counter. When she had just started chopping the lettuce, she heard her first customer enter. 'Sanosuke?' She wondered, when Tsubame reached his table to take his order. "Two bowls of rice please" She heard the customer say. But the voice wasn't Sanosuke's. Slightly disappointed, Tae began to cook the man's breakfast.  
  
Another customer entered. "Green Tea please."  
  
Nope, that was a girl's voice.  
  
And things went on like so for the rest of the morning. 'Where's Sanosuke?' Thought the worried restaurant owner.  
  
Just then Megumi stormed in. "I bet your wondering where Sanosuke is, hmm? OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!" She said, with an evil sneer.  
  
"You Bitch! Let him go now!"  
  
"Hell no. If you want him, you gotta get him yourself. He's at my place. Come, if you think you can take it. OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!" Megumi laughed.  
  
"Then let the games begin."  
  
When Tae approached the premises, Megumi was all set to set the plan in action. (hee hee, bad joke) "Bombs under the dresser, check. Kaltrops on the floor, check. Eraser in door, Check. Misao in the closet, when kept away from Aoshi-sama for two days, check."  
  
Then Tae and Megumi did the honorable hand shaking. Tae said with her teeth tightly clenched, "Let the better woman win."  
  
"Then I guess you forfeit, 'cuz I'm the only woman!" Said the smirking kitsune.  
  
"You will die."  
  
So, the two proceeded to rip each other's heads off. Tae evaded the Kaltrops, destroyed the bombs, and dodged the eraser. Megumi was forced to use her secret weapon. An angry Misao. She opened the door to the closet (With a ten-foot-long pole of course!), and let the demon loose. "After Tae, Misao, she stole Aoshi." Misao bolted down the hallway to greet the unsuspecting waitress. But for some reason, she came back.  
  
Too bad for Megumi that she didn't look at the out-fit Tae was wearing earlier. She was wearing Aoshi's old trench coat. 'Just great.'  
  
Now Misao wanted Megumi's head, for "Aoshi-sama" told her that Megumi had been treating her cruelly. And when an angry ittachi-onna was after you, there was nothing to do but run. And run Megumi did. She ran as fast as she possibly could, screaming at the top of her lungs, "SOMEBODY HEELLLPP ME!!!!" but to no avail. Or at least she thought.  
  
But it seems Sanosuke heard. He ran out of Megumi's bedroom, (Where he was being kept) and screamed, "MEGUMI!!!" while he kindly knocked Misao out for her.  
  
Tae was flabbergasted. She was thoroughly surprised that Sanosuke would help HER, and she wanted to know why. So she asked the question everyone wanted to know for weeks.  
  
"Sano-san, who do you want, me, or her?"  
  
"Yeah Sanosuke, Its time to quite your fucking games and tell us." (HIS fucking games?!!)  
  
"O-Okay." This was it. He was finally going to tell them. "I have been thinking about this for a while now and I've decided. I want to spend the rest of my life with..."  
  
To be continued in Chapter 4.  
  
How did ya'all like chapter 3? In four he finally tells them. Who will it be? (Hee hee I love writing cliff hangers...) By the way guys, the more motivated I am to write the next chapter the quicker it'll be, right? And motivation comes in the form of reviews... (Wink Wink) So... Review please! I don't mind insults either, just what you think!!  
  
Japanese terms- If there is another term that I had forget to translate, please let me know.   
  
Sagara Taichou- Sagara captain  
  
Sekihoutai- Sekihou army (Where Sanosuke and Katsu used to be in)  
  
Kaltrops- The sharp thingies ninjas put on the floor to stop intrusions  
  
Kitsune- fox  
  
Ittachi-onna- Weasel girl 


	4. It's your choice!

Hey guys! Waiting to see who will win Sanosuke's heart? Well that's all up to you, the reader! The ending will rely on who you believe deserves Sanosuke. Who will it be, Megumi or Tae? Send your votes to inu- yasha66earthlink.net! Arigato Gozaimasu! This will end by May 11, so send in your vote quick! 


	5. The Winner is 1

Hey guys! And guess what? That's right! The lucky winner is... Well your going to find out. But, due to angry rabid fans on both sides, I have decided to write alternate endings. This one is just one of the possibilities. Its your choice which you believe!  
  
The Kitsune vs the Waitress  
  
Chapter 5- The Winner is (Ending #1)  
  
"The one I have spent my entire time wanting, since I first laid eyes on her beautiful face... Is the one I would risk my life to save, like I had many times before and I will many times in the future. I don't care if you grow to hate me, but I want to be with you and no one else, for the rest of my life. Do you except my love for you, Megumi?" Sano finished with his hand out towards Megumi, gesturing that he was indeed speaking to her.  
  
"MEGUMI???!!!" Shouted a tearing Tae. She fell in shock, not even bothering to catch her self as she landed harshly on her quivering knees. "H-how? I thought you loved me Sanosuke! All the free food I have given you, and that time you saved me from those drunkards..." 'No!' thought Tae. 'You've known from the beginning that he never loved you. You knew the entire time that being with him was just a quixotic dream you wanted so selfishly, and tried to steal it from Megumi out of jealously like a child taking another's candy. You knew you were lying to yourself, but you wanted it so badly that you would lie to make you feel that want from him. Well the joke's over now. He belongs to your rival, Megumi again. If you can't except that then you're pathetic.'  
  
"Sano has chosen. I-I wish you two a happy life together." Tae just barely managed to choke. "And I hope you treat him well Megumi, for your sake. If you even make the slightest fun of him, I'll make sure he has someone to treat him better."  
  
"T-Thank you!" Said the ecstatic new bride (they got engaged? When?) "I'm so sorry Tae..."  
  
"You're only saying that because you have Sanosuke now!"  
  
"Damn straight!"  
  
"Why you $$ #0%&!!!  
  
"8!(#!!"  
  
"Well Guys... I guess ending #1 is over! I hope you enjoy the other two!" Said the very worried Sanosuke, who would have to break up this fight in a little while... Good Luck!! (And You'll need it!)  
  
The End!!!  
  
So guys! That was ending #1!! And yes, I know, this chapter was very short. I may go back and add more after I write the other endings! For all you Tae fans, Endings two and Three await you!! But I need Reviews to be motivated!!! So REVIEW PLEASE!!!!! 


	6. The Winner is 2

The Kitsune vs the Waitress  
  
Chapter 6- The Winner is... (#2)  
  
By Misao's Angel  
  
Sano took a deep breath. He knew admitting this would be hard, for him and for the women. But he had to. It was time. He continued, "When Kenshin first convinced me to start my life over, I didn't know what to do. Life was hard for a short while, changing everything I believed in wasn't easy at all. But you saved me from the brink of insanity by just offering your sweat hospitality, and allowing me to gaze upon your beautiful face. You fed me..." Both girls gasped at this, "You took care of me, and All I could do to help you was to hurt others in the process. I thought I had experienced love before you, but these past weeks have changed my mind. The one and only girl I want to spend the rest of my life with, is you Tae."  
  
Megumi fainted.  
  
Tae would have too, if the cold tears on her face weren't keeping her awake. "I love you too Sanosuke! I want to be with you."  
  
"Then lets make this happen."  
  
"What about Megumi?"  
  
"Just leave her hear to rot. I couldn't care less."  
  
Just when the couple believed they were content, Misao decided to awaken from her brief sleep, and just happened to see Sano cuddle up close to her "Aoshi-sama". So doing what every other (Like there are any others) angry weasel-girl, she bit Sano's head off. But hey! At least the two were together in theory right? Well have a nice day.  
  
Hee Hee! Sorry Tae/Sano fans, but that was tempting. There are no happy endings when Misao's angel is the writer!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! I love abusing my privileges! Well I hope you guys don't hate me. But if you do. Don't be afraid to say so! By the way, there is one ending left for everyone to enjoy so, stick around! 


	7. The Winner is 3

The Kitsune vs the Waitress  
  
Chapter 7- The Winner is... (#3)  
  
By Misao's Angel  
  
'Why'd I have to open my big mouth?' wondered a very nervous Sanosuke. 'I don't want to have to tell them which one, but I'll try. I just hope somebody doesn't kill me...'  
  
"the truth is... that throughout these years I have spent at the Kamiya dojo... There is only one girl that I like. Sorry..."  
  
Just at that moment, there was an extremely loud 'WHACK!' (probably caused by a certain ahem Dojo-owner beating up a bratty kid for calling her "Busu") That drowned out part of Sanosuke's speech. All the two ladies managed to hear over the loud disturbance was...  
  
"...e but I only have eyes for..."  
  
'WHACK!' 'I swear I'm going to murder them both when this is over...' Thought the temperamental Megumi.  
  
"...e" Whew. He said it. Now here come the punches...  
  
"Did you hear that!" exclaimed Tae, "He said 'I'm sorry kitsune but I only have eyes for Tae'!!!"  
  
"No, You've got it backwards!" hissed Megumi, "He said 'Sorry Tae but I only have eyes for the kitsune!"  
  
"Your wrong!"  
  
"No your wrong!!!"  
  
Tae was losing her temper... and fast. This resturaunt owner was ready to give back the abuse she had taken for the past couple weeks. She took her observations on Kaoru's tomboyish actions to her advantage, and put all the strength washing dishes had to offer, and punched Megumi in the gut. The wheasing Megumi was not about to give up so easily. Thanks to that annoying Battousai following her around for weeks, she had learned enough martial arts (For her safety while she left him to go to the bathroom) to return the punch to Tae's face. Both of their weak bodies couldn't take it (Sorry Tae, but washing dishes just ain't gonna cut it) and they both fainted simultaneously. Seeing that they were indeed knocked out, a laughing Sanosuke said,  
  
"Let me repeat my earlier statement. 'Sorry Megumi, Tae, but I only have eyes for Kagome.'"  
  
Thus, Kagome freed herself from inu-yasha's arms and ran off into the sunset with Sano.  
  
The End!  
  
Ending #3! Now my story is finnaly completed!!! Please review so I can edit it, and make the story more enjoyable! By the way, could you guys tell me which was your favorite ending? I really wanna know... 


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